Monday, March 29, 2010

On the Creative Blogger Award (Or, My pants are on fire!)

First off, let me note that my blog has had a facelift (my first dance with cosmetic surgery!), and I'd like to hear your opinions.

Now on to more important things...
A few weeks ago, I was awarded the Sunshine Blog Award, and now another honor has graced my blog: Lesa's Bald Faced Liar Creative Writer Blogger Award, thanks to Lindsey, at Dangerous With a Pen. Aw, shucks guys! (I'm blushing.)

So all I've got to do is list 7 things about myself, 6 of which are lies but one of which is 100% true. Then I'll award 5 more bloggers with this honor. OK, here it goes...

1. When my second child was eighteen months old, I fell from a horse and broke my back. Fortunately, it was the one vertebrae that can be broken without causing paralysis, so I spent six weeks in a back brace and on virtual bed rest, unable to pick up my needy toddler, who took out her frustration on her older brother by pulling out a clump of his hair so fiercely that he still (seven years later) has a small permanent bald spot.

2. At twenty-two years old, I was slated to be the maid-of-honor at a dear friend’s wedding. The night before, we went out for her bachelorette party. I got so drunk that I woke up the next morning in a luxury hotel room, all alone and having no idea how I had gotten there. (This was before the age of cell phones.) My last memory had been doing shots with two gorgeous guys at a club with my girlfriends and then stupidly agreeing to continue partying with them in their hotel. I don’t remember what happened in that hotel room, but after sneaking out and hailing a cab to the hotel where my friend was getting married, I discovered I had been dethroned by the bride for my abhorrent behavior and demoted to bridesmaid.

3. When I was eight months pregnant, I got into a car accident when I pulled out of a parking lot and onto the main road. I hit an oncoming Jaguar that had been obscured by a bush. Thankfully, I had an older car with no airbag, so my belly was alright, but as I got out of the car and saw the other driver getting out of the Jaguar, I recognized her as my ex-boyfriend’s mother. She approached me, established that I was okay, and then said, “You had it coming for breaking up with my son.”

4. When I was a toddler, the pediatrician decided my legs weren’t growing properly and I was put into leg braces. The doctor was very concerned I would be very “small”, well under five feet tall due to my leg condition. Today I am 5’-6”.

5. My ex-boyfriend was a white South African (during the Apartheid years) who spent a short time in a Johannesburg prison for helping his black best friend beat up a group of white guys who were bullying them.

6. My paternal grandfather was a Jewish man who had three wives in his life, the first of which was my grandmother and the third of which was a Taiwanese girl he married when he was 70 and she was 26. They had one daughter (my father’s sister and therefore my aunt), who was raised in Taiwan as a Buddhist. When she was 18 years old, she came to New York to study at the university, met an Orthodox Jewish boy, went to Israel with him, and stayed there for a year to convert to Judaism. So at 43 years old, I now have a 29-year-old Jewish Taiwanese aunt.

7. I have a Chihuahua who has survived being literally run over by a car. She ran across the street just in time to get caught up in the car’s tire well, which made a horrifying thump-thump noise as it spun her around (as I screamed in shock), but she ran away with nothing more than a small limp.

I must confess that there is a smidgeon of truth to every one of these, but only one is honestly valid. I will patiently await your guesses to see how clever you all are. And now I pass on this honor to...

Jm Diaz at An Ulterior Motive
Sweatpants Mom
Julie at A Day in the Wife
Alan at Unauthorized Insights

For the record, I follow many other amazingly creative bloggers (see my bloglist for proof!), but I choose these five because I'm pretty sure they haven't already put out one of these "liar" lists, and I'm also curious to see what they'll come up with so I can learn more about them.

Thanks again to Lindsey for having faith in my creativity ;-)


  1. I love your lies! Very curious to find out which of these is 100% true, and which are embellished. You've really challenged me with this one. I'm pretty much an open book, and I haven't delved into much fictional writing. But this sounds like a lot of fun (I have lied once or twice in my time).

    As for my guess...#1 would explain a lot about your daughter (ha! J/K), but I'm betting your subconscious took the word "bald" from the award to create this story. #2 wasn't you, that was me. #3 couldn't have went down that way. You're an excellent driver (not that I picture you as a high-functioning autistic middle-aged man, but - I don't see you pulling out in front of a bitch). #4 wasn't you, that was Forest Gump. #5 might be true, or it just might be a hot fantasy. #6 provides the most detail, which leaves me to believe it's fabricated (lies tend to spin out of control), and yet, who DOESN'T have a 29 year-old Jewish Tawainese aunt? Dime a dozen. #7 - too early after Rox. Can't go there.

    Final tally: Number 6?

    p.s. nice job on the site renos. I'm getting sick of my "Larry King Live" set, but I haven't mastered blogosphere yet.

  2. Oh, Aleigh, you'll just have to wait and see ;-)

  3. Oddly enough, they all sound plausible, but for some reason I am going with #1. Because logic would say the first one FOR SURE isn't true, so I'm going with reverse psychology.

    Love the new look, pretty colors!

  4. I'm going with the chihuahua story.